Cheese, Ketchup, and Pickles Only

New Mexico vs. Colorado

2011-04-27T19:48:00.003-05:00

Tuesday and Wednesday were tales of two cities.

Tuesday night we were in Chama, NM a small railroad town that exists along the axis of one road. We met people from numerous ethnicities in this town of maybe 1,000- Israelis, Native Americans, Latinos, African Americans, and Caucasians (even Yankees!). I talked to a lady who, once she find out I was going be a physician told me TMI: that she been married 4 times and told to me all about her relationship with her father. Also Chip, my dad's new best friend, was Rasta-looking guy whose eyes lit up when he talked about his high school age son. These folks were mostly poor but very close to each other. New Mexico is full of towns like this surrounded by mountains, cacti, and sagebrush. The Native Americans were friendly, hawking their goods but willing to engage us even if we didn't make a purchase. They said they lived in pueblos on their self-governed land so that they could have plumbing and electricity in their small collections of homes. My summary poor, arid, beautiful, and friendly.

Then as we drove north across the AZ-CO border things began to change. Suddenly there was grass and the ground rather than desert shrubs. The trees that were bushy in NM stretched into tall stately aspens and pines. Not only did the trees grow in size as we headed north, so did the houses. The adobe huts and trailer homes were few and far between and the log cabin vacation homes on hundreds of acres of land were around every bend. Durango is a small town of aroudn 15,000 with tourists probably doubling that. The town is idillyic- kids biking through downtown on their way home from school, snow covered mountains at the end of every street, and the Victorian/Craftsman-style homes are so well kept that my only conclusion is that the neighborhood association is run by nazis. We met a man named Rich in the Steamworks Brewery who was a chemist by trade who used his skills to help vineyards and brew houses perfect their fermentation processes. He gave us tons of local knowlegde that he had accumulated from his self-imposed 2 month vacation every year, sounds like France! All this to say, southern CO, Durango included, is a beautiful place full of verdant fields backed by unnamed 5,000 foot peaks with towering trees- almost perfect. I caught myself thinking several times- is this what the Native Americans thought heaven (or their version of it) would look like? Because I'd sure be happy if looked like this. The people here were not as effusive as in Chama, they spoke to us but it seemed like they were doing us a favor. The priorities here are the environment, outdoor activities, and culture. The population is not as mixed as in Chama, mostly white and mostly very fit!

There are great things about both places. My inner voice wars about which I like better. Do I chose culture and education over a place where there is much greater need but also more community? I think this battle is not unique to these two places. Most physicians end up choosing the Durango-type place for the sake of their children, but I think Chama can be a wonderful place to live too, it's just a different kind of education. Anyway, lots of thoughts but much more to see.

Just getting started...

2011-04-26T22:44:00.003-05:00

There are lots of things to narrate already. Its amazing how striking the mountains, snow, and gorges are here in northern New Mexico. I thought this was going to be a more subtle beauty than the likes of Colorado and Utah, but this is impressive. We played the part of tourist at a millennium old pueblo in Taos where we bought gifts for our loved ones and ate what must have been a calorie-busting fried bread topped with cinnamon. After driving through flash snow storms we arrived in Chamas, NM where we met the locals at Foster's Bar (est. in 1881). It was great to experience their hospitality through their less-than-full-toothed smiles and recommendations for restaurants and lodges.

Deep thoughts: Language oftentimes is used to comfort humans in a big, big world. Rocks and snow-capped peaks don't describe the enormity or what I saw today. There are peaks innumerable that make me look like an ant, most of the mountains with snow on them would kill me to scale, and I think a "cap" connotes something much smaller than what I saw today. I think that we humans like to comfort ourselves that we have a lot more control over our destiny and environment than is actually true and language allows us to believe those illusions. Stand at the foot of a mountain, look at the ocean from a shore, and gaze at the stars and realize that you are small.

Cryptococcus

2011-03-22T08:42:00.004-05:00

(Here's a picture from google images of Cryptococcus neoformans. I thinks it's kind of pretty.)

For my first installment of things you didn't know existed but will now haunt (or interest) you...

Cryptococcus neoformans is a encapsulated yeast first discovered in 1894 by a pathologist named Busse. It enters the body via the lungs and host responses range from being an asymptomatic infection to pulmonary disease to meningitis to disseminated disease. Cryptococcus infection is increasing in incidence as HIV becomes more and more prevalent all over the world. In the US about 5-10% of AIDS patients will get C. neoformans and in Zimbabwe, for example, approximatley 85% of AIDS patient get the disease. AIDS, however, is not the only cause of immunosuppression, organ transplantation, steriod use, and even malignancy can result to crytococcus setting up residence in the body.

Prior to 1955, if Cryptococcus entered the brain of a person he or she had an 80% of dying, but since Amphotericin B (nicknamed, Ampho-terrible because of its side effects) was invented mortality has been greatly decreased. Once someone with HIV has this fungus, they are treated intensively for weeks to months with Ampho and then given a lifetime of antifungal medicine to keep it from returning. Even if you are not immunosuppressed but you get infected with this in your lung, you are looking at 6 months to 1 year of medicine (fluconazole) to rid yourself of it.

All this to say, Cryptococcus is a bad boy with a pretty face. Oh yeah, one aside, stay away from aged pigeon droppings because that is where it grows best!

Children's Books

2011-03-16T07:06:00.004-05:00

One of our friends is a elementary school teacher and she talks about having a room for kids to learn in that is word-rich. Meg and I want to have a family that is word-rich so we are reading to our little one everyday. Right now she really only wants to sit down for about half a Dr. Seuss book, but that's not much shorter than my attention span.

The Little Blue Truck is our current favorite because of its rollicking (an adjective used on the cover of the book) illustrations. The story is about a blue truck who is friends with all the animals who live along an ambling country road and he speaks to them all as he slowly goes by. But one day, a dump truck with "big, fat tires" came barreling through just missing little ducky on the road and eventually ending up stuck in a puddle of "muck and mire". No one but Little Blue comes to help the leviathian when he cries out. And despite all his effort he "couldn't quite budge the heavy load" until his animal friends heard his cries for assitance. The dump truck learns his lesson "that a lot depends on a helping hand from a few good friends". Morality is so simple in children's stories, do we make it too complex? One thing is for sure, stories are much better with pictures.

I Have A Dream Speech

2011-03-14T07:28:00.000-05:00

Before last week I had never heard this speech in its entirety. The emotionality, rationality, spirituality, and patriotism of the speech are woven so richly together that it seems that King takes the nation's hopes, ideals, and skepticisms and knits them into his dream of racial equality. As you watch, King sticks very closely to his notes until the very end, and then history begins happen. Right after he encourages the audience to go back to their neighborhoods and peacefully fight for the end of segregation and for better schools for black children is when he begans to vere from his prepared speech. Nothing he says was new to his followers, he'd been preaching like this for years in the sanctuaries of southern churches, but is new to the nation. He goes back and forth seamlessly quoting the Constitution to "Let Freedom Ring" to the Bible to negro spirituals resonating each time with self-evident truths of each person's equal claim to dignity. His vision is still moving today because so much of what he envisioned for us in this speech is yet to come to fruition. I just wanted to share this video because it should not be put on the shelf as an interesting historical event, but as a call to action for us all.

Lent and Blogging

2011-03-09T10:07:00.004-06:00

Could there be any plausible connection between Lent and blogging? Traditionally the Christian church has celebrated Lent through a time of penance and abstience. Thus, my Papa used to give up his least favorite food every year, watermelon, and my dad became a teetotaler for 40 irritable days! (Just kidding Dad, if you ever read this.) So this year I have decided that, not only am I going to give up some cherished delectables, but that I am going to actively pursue some good things. One of my goals is to take action in my life. I tend to be one who prefers quiet thoughtfulness over direct action and I'm feeling a bit imbalanced. So blogging, despite its obvious narcissitic tendencies, is a way for me to grow my creative side. I got some help from my friend Will who encouraged me to do this by resurrecting his blog recently. So think about some things to give up or take up for Lent and consider blog reading as an option!

Summertime and Livin's Easy

2009-06-17T09:52:00.004-05:00

Last night on our muggy, but much needed walk (thanks to Moe's burritos) Meg and I discussed how nice it is to have a seasonal change in our work schedule. Having a new routine has opened our eyes to new experiences and ideas that we would normally breeze by during the hectic school year. For example, I've been able to do a book exchange with a couple of friends, I've started checking out CDs from the library to add some new jams to my repertoire, and I've gotten a couple of interesting jobs.

I know changing jobs every summer isn't possible for people with real jobs, but I think we all ought to try to incorporate seasonal changes into our lives (besides what kind of yard work we do). For a very long time we humans have been dependent on the seasons to order their lives and activities. But now, we work in offices and live in air conditioned homes (neither of which are bad things), but these amenities make it easy to become detached and uninterested in the changes going on around us. For example, the constellations that glimmer in the night sky vary according to the time of the year, but we city dwellers can see very few stars to notice this change. I'm glad we're moving out of suburban Vestavia, so maybe I can get a telescope and start exploring the cosmos at night in Lake View. Well, once I start working full time for 40-80 hours a week in a hospital or clinic I'll read this and reminisce of better and more interesting days, but I bet that ache for newness and change will persist.

Confronting Scholarship

2009-05-27T08:13:00.004-05:00

So I'm doing a "scholarly activity" this summer as part of fulfilling my requirements for medical school graduation. We are encouraged to pursue publication in whatever field we work in, but this seems to be a foolhardy venture to me. I'm working on an ethics paper and when I put my thoughts to screen they sound so sophmoric. I recall my mind working more freely in days of my undergraduate English literature courses, but now I think my medical education has put my creative powers in a straightjacket. How can I resolve this low flow of creative juices in the short 2 months I have to accomplish this project? Now I know why physicians of yesteryear wrote poetry and fiction in their spare moments- the ability to think creatively atrophies with the slightest bit of neglect.

Bluegrass as it should Be

2009-05-15T15:21:00.005-05:00

In these days of Nickel Creek and String Cheese Incident (who I sometimes can tolerate) newgrass, it's nice to step outside and take a deep breathe into clean air of Gillian Welch. Her songs are so sad and picturesque. The tragedy and richness of the Southern culture are given their twangy voice. Annabelle and One More Dollar are my current favorites.

Maybe This Time

2009-05-14T11:25:00.004-05:00

I heard once that you can't keep someone's attention for more than 21 words. If this is true I've lived my life over the past two years in millions of 21 word increments.

Things that bring gladness to my heart:
Being finished with boards and have passed
The summertime
Moving from our apartment
Fiction
High schoolers at my church that I'm going to hang with this summer
Having time to blog and figure out how to work facebook again.

That's four increments of 21. (If don't count this statement, the title, or contractions, but you do count the numbers, if anyone is actually still paying attention.)

My Life's Running Book List

2009-01-21T10:40:00.008-06:00

I love books. They are a refuge to me from the day. Typically, I've read books around our apartment randomly choosing whatever suits my fancy at the moment, but now I've decided to get organized because I want to get to the end of some books. So here's my list that I plan to add to and finish for the next lifetime or so: (Also, if you have a similar list or are inspired to make one please share it!)

Have and want to read
1. Flowers in the Dust Bin (with music) by James Miller
2. House of God by Samuel Shem
3. Oxford American, Nat Geo, and Smithsonian Magazines
4. Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond

Need to Finish List
1. Under the Banner of Heaven by Krakauer
2. Evil and the Justice of God by NT Wright
3. Orthodoxy by Chesterton
4. Catcher in the Rye by Salinger
5. On Doctoring by Reynolds
6. History of Medicine by Porter, Gordon, and Duffin (3 volumes)
7. American Mania by Whybrow
8. On Presbyterianism by Lucas
9. Rediscovering Jesus by Muggeridge
10. Don’t Know Much about the Civil War by Kenneth Davis

Don’t Have but Want to Read List
1. Better for All the World: The Secret History of Forced Sterilization and America's Quest for Racial Purity by Harry Bruinius
2. The Language of God: A Scientist Presents Evidence for Belief by Francis S. Collins
3. In the Shadow of Man by Jane Goodall
4. Bioethics: An Anthology by Helga Kuhse and Peter Singer
5. The Moral of the Story: An Anthology of Ethics Through Literature by Peter Singer
6. Blood and Guts: A Short History of Medicine by Roy Porter
7. Salvador Dali by Salvador Dali and Luis Romero
8. Flannery O'Connor and the Christ-Haunted South by Ralph C. Wood
9. The Feminization of American Culture by Ann Douglas
10. Eiger Dreams by Krakauer
11. Christian Origins and the Question of God 3 Volumes of by NT Wright
12. Fast Food Nation by Linklater
13. Dr. Zhivago by Pasternak
14. The Shack by William Young

Author List
1. Edwin C. Hui
2. Wendell Berry
3. Dorothy Sayers
4. Alvin Plantiga
5. Michael Polyani
6. Kurt Vonnegut
7. Fyodor Dostoeovsky

It all depends...

2009-01-16T14:13:00.004-06:00

…on our worldview. A worldview is how we look at the world according the sum of all our experiences. It’s not just our college years or traumatic events that inform our worldviews: our parents, our environment, our friends, our elementary schoolteachers, definitely TV, our happy, bored, and everyday moments, and whatever else we put in our brains affects us. Things that we don’t even remember from childhood have changed the way we look at the world now. It is this observation of the human experience that is the cornerstone of postmodernism. But, postmodernists take the concept and expand it to say that since I have a worldview specific only to me, then I can only have truth that is true to me and my experiences and not anyone else. This, as many have written about extensively, is the worldview that Americans breathe. We love to say, ah, that’s a nice belief FOR YOU. (Did someone mention Oprah?)
So why am I saying this? Because of a conversation I had here in med school with a guy about what doctors should do with their overly educated (and way too expensive) minds. Okay, so here’s the setup. A group of us were talking about this new approach to medicine where rich people pay willing doctors to be on retainer for them. Basically what this means is that a doctor (most likely a primary care doc) has about 80-100 regular patients (most have way more than this) who each pay him a few thousand bucks a year to be their personal doctor. In addition, his patients pay him every time he visits them at their home, work, or whatever is convenient for them. So if you do the math this guy is making really good money and he gets to know his patients really well. That’s sounds perfect, right? Well, yes, except that he/she is not really helping the systemic problem of healthcare delivery because these folks could get good healthcare anytime they want. So I said to the group, “Don’t physicians have a responsibility to other human beings, their profession, and society as a whole to fix some of the inequities in the healthcare system?” (In asking this I understand that people can do with their medical degree whatever they want, but I’m asking what is best.) And the guy responds, “That depends if you consider medicine to be a moral endeavor.” And I said, “Yes, it does depend on that, do you think it is?” And he said, “I’m not saying it is or it isn’t I’m just making the point.” I wonder what he really thinks…. Anyway, it just goes to show that even in medicine, a profession supposedly (or ideally) devoted to service, a worldview can turn those ideals on their head.

My point is that what you think matters to other people. In this guy’s case, for example, whether or not needy people get his much needed attention depends on if he thinks medicine is a moral endeavor. What do we consider moral or amoral? It changes the way we live and the quality of people’s lives around us.

A Cynic makes New Year's Resolutions

2009-01-12T11:35:00.009-06:00

(Sunset in Fort Morgan, AL)

I looked up the word cynic in the dictionary. Its most commonly used definition is “a person who has little faith in human sincerity and goodness”. I hate to say it but this describes me all too well. The funny thing is that this is mostly a projection of mine. In psychology authors talk about how it is unhealthy to project or place the faults you see in yourself onto others; and, unfortunately that’s what I do. I doubt my own sincerity and goodness, and therefore, doubt everyone else’s so that I can protect myself from too much self-loathing. (If anyone has ever read Catcher in the Rye, the narrator Holden Caulfield is a perfect, hilarious example of this.) Anyway, this off-putting tendency of mine is one I try to fight, but the roots run deep.

Despite this, every year I make New Year’s resolutions. I love the changing of the year, there always seems to be more contemplation, hope, and fun around this time. We Americans eat black-eyed peas (for me only a face-twitching spoonful soaked in salt), listen to sermons about living with a purpose, watch football with family, and melodramatically talk about how we could never have guessed all the things that happened last year. This is a time where I get to hush that cynic’s voice and dream a little about the future. This is the time of the year when I believe most strongly that change is possible. Unfortunately for Meg, I often wax eloquently (and incessantly) in the car ride home from our holiday vacation. So this year I’ve resolved to read more in the evenings as my form of relaxation, instead of mindlessly watching the TV. Also, I want to start writing letters to loved ones because I think letter writing is a lost art that keeps families and friends close.

Oh yeah, the other definition for a cynic is “one of a school of ancient Greek philosophers founded by Antisthenes, marked by ostentatious contempt for ease and pleasure”. To save the suspense, I don’t plan on developing contempt for pleasure this year, but maybe ease. See, when ease is my primary aim, my pleasure in ease begins to diminish. But, when I get pleasure in things like reading over TV and letter writing over growing distance, I realize that contempt for ease is not so bad after all because it gives pleasure that lasts longer than a half an hour episode. So this year I resolve to be a half-Cynic.

Pandora

2008-08-22T07:29:00.004-05:00

"Familiarity breeds contempt" should be the theme of Pandora Radio. Because Meg and I don't have much disposable income and because I think spending $15-20 on a CD is a bit much, I often get tired of listening to the same songs over and over again on my iTunes. To illustrate, I have one song that I've listened to 232 times! Now, most people don't sit in front of their computer, listen to music, and study for hours on end a day like me but really, 232 is a little much. What's more, I'll most likely increase that number today. But, alas, I found a solace from the doldrums of my music collection in Pandora's box of goodies.

Pandora.com is website where you the listener can be your own DJ, sort of. You don't even have to create an account (although you can for free), all you have to do is type in one of your favorite artists or songs in the home page text box and it will create a station tailored to that specific genre. What's even better is that as they play the music you can give the songs a thumbs up or down and it will reconfigure to play stuff more in line with your tastes. It's perfect for those like myself who are disgruntled at commercialism and the utter lack of taste on regular radio and who don't want to spend $15 a month on new CDs or Sirius radio. I just wanted to give a shout out to one of the things that makes med school life, and for that matter work life, much more doable.

I Love Vacation

2008-08-01T17:23:00.006-05:00

I'm in Memphis right now drinking some good Pinot Grigio and waiting on a great meal made by Mrs. Johnson. Meg and I have spent this week with Dr. Ethelyn Smith in Senatobia, MS and it was great. We watched movies, told a lot of stories, learned about what it was like to live in Mississippi from the 1920s until now, read some, looked at old pictures from the beginning of the 20th century, read civil war letters (wow!), mowed some grass (I love being outside), went to the lake with Louis and Emily and others, and much more. I really enjoyed getting to see how full of life and energy Ethelyn is. She's 87 years old and she still mows her lawn, takes care of ailing friends, talks to almost everyone in the grocery store, and I'm pretty sure she still accomplishes a lot more in one day than I do.

Ethelyn also gave us some old tyme books to take home and read. I acquired a Bible that was published in the late 1800s that had a lock of hair in it as well as Sunday school lessons from the deceased owner. In addition to the collectibles, I also read My Dog Skip. Oh man, what a great story. If you haven't read it and you are a sucker for the nostalgic or you think that this world could use a little more idealism or you just like books by Mark Twain, then you should read it. It's a coming of age/adventure story about a boy and his dog who grow up in Mississippi in the 40s and Senatobia was a perfect setting to read it in. I thought about my dog Jackie Sue who was a Jack Russell terrier who we had from my 7th grade year until April of this year and I fondly remembered the days of my youth.

Well, I'm still on vacation and the chlorine from the pool is still pungent in my nose and I want to fix that before dinner so good night and don't forget to take a vacation, if you do it right it heals both body and mind.

Back to the Grind (Sort of)

2008-07-23T13:24:00.004-05:00

(A picture of me working hard! Actually, in this picture I'm in Peru blogging to you.)

So we've been back in the States for two days now and I started working again at my research/clincal job. It's not that I'm not grateful for my job or that I don't really like it at times but it's been difficult being back. The first problem is that I've got some sinus issues right now and I'm taking medicines that make me feel like a zombie all day at work. The ironic thing that being machine-like helps me get through the duldrums of research data-entry. Second, I finally broached the subject to my professor/mentor today about writing an article on the research that we are doing, but up until then it's been mostly aimless reading about nutrition and odd-jobs that I readily accept from co-workers to help fill my time. Hopefully I can find some mind-stimulating work as the summer winds down. I'm still committed to trying to get my first published article out of this.

Alas, I only have 2 1/2 more days until I have another entire week off. It's not really that hard being me. The last paragraph I built up pity for myself and now I show that I'm nothing but a softie. See, Meg and I are going to Celeste's wedding in Rome, GA and then we're going to go visit the famous, revered, and all too humble Dr. Ethelyn Smith from Senetobia, MS. I can't wait, I hope to get tons more doctorin' and small town stories out of her. Ethelyn was a physician in Senatobia for about 60 years and she cannot drive half a mile in her car without waving to someone or telling us a story about the town she knows everything about. I wish I had the same sense of belonging and home that she does. She's so thoughtful that she kicked her favorite cat out of the house two months ago and bought a HEPA filter because she knew we were coming to visit this summer and that my allergies were bad last time we stayed.

Anyway, I'll give some more ideas on Peru once I have the chance to decompress my sinuses and have clear thoughts. Also, I'm meeting with Carlos Torres-Sanchez tomorrow from the Jefferson County Health Department to see how I can get involved with the Latino health here in Birmingham. Hopefully, I'll have a chance to raise awareness at school, learn Spanish better, and be an advocate for some folks who don't have much social support.

3 & 4

2008-07-19T07:22:00.003-05:00

(See Spanish word of the day)

Lesson 3: People treat you differently according to your supposed place is society. I've been called everything from friend and doctor to probably some really nasty words in Quechua. The reason is because I've never occupied such different places in a society as I do here. See, when I'm in the clinic working with Dr. Allen and Jose everyone sees me as helpful and caring; but, when I'm walking around Cusco or some ruins or riding a bus in San Jeronimo with a monstrous camera around my neck they see me as a tourist, and I know from my dad that locals don't take too kindly to tourists. I often ignore the fact that I am different than the rest of the world around me when I'm somewhere other than the Southeast. All this to say, I've learned that Meg was right about cultural sensitivity. She's always been there to inform me when I stepped out of sheer gringo-ness (gringo is what Latinos often call Americans, not a demeaning term here) into offensiveness. This makes me think about what I can do differently back at home. First, I'd like to be better at including people who feel outside of my Southern-american culture. Also, I think Will and I are going to find some UAB students who are native Spanish speakers who want to learn English better and form a friendship so we can both learn from each other. Most importantly, though, I've learned that I need approach other cultures recognizing that I'm an outsider and to take a learner's stance toward them. I know that I tend to be a little to aggressive with friendship and sometimes people take offense to me invading their lives or space.

Lesson 4: Peru is the land of mysterious nocturnal noises. Seriously, every night we hear things that make very little sense to us. We hear a guy walking down the street with a very distinct whistle, people on loudspeakers making announcements that they will buy our old belongings, dogs barking at all hours, rats training above our heads training for the Beijing Olympics, roosters crowing, pigeons whooing, and even loud explosions from time to time. So, if your coming to San Jeronimo, Peru, expecting quiet solitude you might want to reconsider. Now, I'm sure that these sounds would make a lot more sense if we were native Peruvians who knew how to interpret them, but to me they will remain a mystery.

Spanish word of the day: ojotas. This word in fact has no direct English translation, but allow me to offer my own: "really sweet sandals made by Quechua women out of old car tires". Okay, maybe linguistics isn't my strength, but Meg and I both bought a pair for a whopping $3. We were thinking about marketing these shoes as handmade, fair-trade, environmentally-friendly, and a local economy-stimulating product to sell to the trend setters in the US. I think we have a great marketing idea here, so if anyone is business-minded and can make a sweet logo give me a call.

One More Day in the Clinic

2008-07-17T21:32:00.004-05:00

(Picture of ruins at Pisaq where Meg and I hiked today.)

Tomorrow is my last day to be in the clinic. I can't believe almost three weeks have come and past. The time has flown by. I'm not sure how much more time I'll have to write so I'll try my best to give some summarizing thoughts in the next two or three entries before we leave.

First, not all that glitters is gold. This comes from "Lord of the Rings" and it's basic meaning, I think, is that just because something has initial appeal doesn't mean that it is always worth pursuing. Our experiences in Peru here have been moving, difficult, beautiful, and thought/career-provoking, but even in three shorts weeks it has not always glorious. Peru is dirty even by my standards (and to the Johnsons that's impressive), people are always around you, I don't understand the language that well, there's poverty all around, the streams are open sewers, and there's simply a lot of things I'd need to get used to here if we were to come for a while.

Second, it takes a village to raise a child. In this case, the child is the clinic. Recently, Dr. Allen has been presented with the opportunity to expand his health services to a care more for the whole person. He's gotten some calls from a local hospital who is unable to provide for housing, community, spiritual, and daily needs to chronically ill patients and they have asked him if he could do these things for them. He's really excited about serving people who are the poorest of the poor here in Peru and these patients qualify. But, here's the village part: He can't do it on his own. This, of course, is true because he's already got tons of help from his staff, other Mennonite physicians, and short-termers like myself coming in, but he and is family need more. Currently, due to increasing patient volume, the clinic is running on a financial deficit. The friction lies in the fact that Hinterland Health Ministry is seeing the expansion of it's services to a more holistic model, but they will be unable to provide the proper medications, foods, housing, etc. if they don't get some financial help. My lesson: I've finally seen first hand the needs of people a long way away from home. When I hear able pleas for donations I think about how far away I am from the problem and how I can't really make a difference in people's lives, but it's now obvious to me how untrue that is. So if you want to give some money to the Hinterland Health Ministry you can click here and find info on how to do it. I promise they didn't ask me to do this, I just know that I want to see people get better and the only people I've seen doing well here are those at Hinterland. Also, if you want to peruse their website, a put a link on the right hand side called "The Allens Website".

Spanish of the day: el sapo meaning "the frog". I have not see one frog since I've been here in Peru. Sapo, in fact, refers to a game who's closest American relative is cornhole. Sapo is a game that is played with large metal, gold-colored coins about the size of 7 half dollars stacked together. The goal of the game is to get the coins into holes cut into the top of a bedside table-looking things. And to make the game more interesting there is a frog set in the middle of the table whose mouth is open and if you somehow get your coin in the mouth you get tons of points. All this to say, Sapo is an awesome game that should be imported to the States and I might do it.

Three Years In Peru

2008-07-16T07:14:00.005-05:00

So Meg and I burned our Passports this morning and have decided to stay in Peru for at least three years. Actually, the title refers not to how long we are staying but our three-year anniversary today. Plus, I think if we burned our Passports we might be staying here for longer than three years! We're heading into town again tonight to eat dinner at a place the Allens highly praised called Cicciolina. The New York Times actually gave this restaurant high a review, so two recommendations is enough for us. We're also both taking most of the day off tomorrow to hike, relax, reflect, and enjoy our last few days in the Southern Hemisphere. (By the way, when the water drains in the sink it drains clockwise. What direction does your water drain?) So we won't be staying in a Bed and Breakfast like we did the last two years, but I can't say I'm disappointed about being in Peru and waking up to look out our our windows and see mountains 360 degrees around us. A good anniversary song that Meg and I both love is "Start with the Ending" by David Wilcox. Being honest and making each other stronger is what we try to make our marriage about. What I love about this song is that it says that death must come before life in a very domestic, artistic fashion. Here are the words:

The secret of a happy marriage,
maybe you should write this down
If you want to keep a love together,
the best way is to end it now
Because when you both know its over,
suddenly the truth comes out
You can talk about your secret passion,
you can talk about your restless doubt.

When there's no pretending,
then the truth is safe to say,
Start with the ending,
get it out of the way
Now there's no defending,
because no one has to win
Start with the ending,
its the best way to begin.

After you have both decided,
you were missing something that you need
The ways that you were too short-sighted,
get easier for you to see
And after all the expectations
shatter on the kitchen floor
You just see another human suffering,
and you wonder what the war was for.

When there's no pretending,
then the truth is safe to say,
Start with the ending,
get it out of the way
Now there's no defending,
because no one has to win
Start with the ending,
its the best way to begin.

Happy anniversary darling,
we go back a long, long time
I think about our lives together,
I'm so grateful you are here in mine
And I know you'll keep on changing,
you're moving in this dance with me
I love the way we embrace the future
and keep the past a memory.

So there's no defending
that the old ways could remain
We start with the ending
and things will never be the same
Now there's no defending,
because no one has to win
Start with the ending,
its the best way to begin.

Life In San Jeronimo

2008-07-14T19:12:00.012-05:00

For all the faithful readers, sorry that I haven't written in a few days. I finally signed up for Skype, so I've felt connected enough to the US to satisfy my blogging desires for a few days. Plus, everything has been pretty normal lately except that Will left us for the States today. Also, I apologize for all the pictures today, but they tell a better story than I do.

This weekend we ended up in downtown Cusco again because the ruin, Saqsaywaman (sound it out, it's like Mad Gab), that's really close to the city cost more than we were willing to pay. So, I actually enjoyed walking around town more this time because it wasn't nearly as crowded as it was on Friday night. In addition, Meg, Will, and I took a good bit of time to just read and think as we sat in the plazas and on the overlooks.

Besides our Saturday excursion into town, we hung just around San Jeronimo the rest of the weekend. Yesterday we went to a little outdoor restaurant and paid under $17 for four people with hefty entrees, an appetizer, and four drinks. It's crazy how cheap it is to live here. A person who makes $1,000 a month here is well into the middle class and most likely owns his/her own home and car, which is a rarity. We also walked around the market taking pictures, smelling the smells, and being just much a spectacle to the locals as they are to us. It was sobering to think that the camera I had hanging around my neck cost more than what most folks make selling at market in a year. Greg (Will's replacement as apartment-mate) noticed something about the vendors in the market that I thought was profound, he said, "I think it's great that even though some people here are dirt poor, they still keep a sense of beauty about themselves in their dress and culture." It's true, even though poverty can dampen people's perception of human dignity, it doesn't ever completely mute the image of their creative Maker. These pictures prove it. (Pictures: 1. Saqsaywaman, 2. overlooking Cusco, 3. plaza de Armas, 4. folded mantas that women wear to carry their belongings and their progeny, 5. a stack of hats that I found in a store that sells these to Quechua women)

As an aside, I've been writing a lot about poverty in the last few days not because this whole country is poor and I feel sorry for everyone here. On the contrary, it is a very wonderful place full of cultural and historical richness, beautiful buildings, and resplendent scenery. The reason it's been such a hot topic for me is that I'm now seeing it for the first time in a concrete way and letting it sink into my bones.

Also, tomorrow I'll put a couple pictures of our abode as requested by my sister. Uploading these pictures has taken me all of the movie "Rudy" plus about 20 minutes, so I quit for tonight.

Downtown Cusco

2008-07-12T09:35:00.009-05:00

Last night we rode a taxi into town (quite an adventure in itself) and took in the scenery of an evening in Cusco. We ate at this great place called Inka Grille and walked around the city and looked at all the beautifully lit cathedrals. Interestingly, when we got down there at about 8 pm there were kids getting out of school! I couldn't imagine leaving school past dark. Almost all the schools here require kids to wear uniforms and usually the elementary kids go to school from 8-1 pm and older kids from 3-8 pm in keeping with the mid-afternoon siesta. Walking around Cusco was great, but I have to say that I'm not much of a city boy. Cusco's excitement alongside its colonial beauty is marvelous, but there was so much homeless and poverty that I couldn't enjoy it without a mix of sadness. I think this mixture is true of every city and I can't really bring myself to enjoy it the way I enjoy looking at the stars or the waves or any other natural beauty.

We actually went downtown with Will and Greg our outgoing and incoming apartment-mates. Will is a fellow med students at UASOM with me and he's been down here 5 weeks with Dr. Allen. I've really enjoyed hanging out with him the past 10 or 11 days. It's been really encouraging to hear his perspectives on medicine, his experience here, and his desires for the future. His realism coupled with his hope for change is both motivating and refreshing. We've kind of run in different crowds in Birmingham, but there's not doubt we've developed a good friendship since we've been here. I hope when I start thinking more concretely about career, partners, and place to serve that Will and I can discuss the possibility of working together.

Greg's here from Bozeman, MT via his church. He's actually an ambassador for his congregation who is looking to partner with some missionaries abroad. He's been traveling by himself to Nicaragua, Costa Rica, and Peru for about 4 weeks. He's a philosophy professor at Montana State University and used to work a L'Abri. I've really enjoyed getting to know him so far and I'm sure Meg and I will have some good conversations with him as well.

To all of you who have commented on the blog, thank you, we've really enjoyed getting your thoughts and feedback. Actually, I would say that you made our day yesterday with your humor, encouragement, and scholarly/technical efforts (Tim and Mom).

Spanish word of the day: El agua! The word that our taxi drive exclaimed as his favorite drink to keep him awake as he works late hours seven days a week. Also, the word for the stuff that we can't drink out of the tap because our digestive systems can't handle the bits of bacteria coming through the faucet.

Leshmaniasis

2008-07-11T07:03:00.004-05:00

(picture of the clinic and the grassy waiting room)

Yesterday I saw my second case of cutaneous Leshmaniasis. The young lady's disease that I saw yesterday was much more progressed than the first case. Her nose was pointed at the end like a witch's from the destruction of her skin by the protozoan parasite. She had a scar from a previous ulcer that had manifested about 20 years ago. This type of dormancy is characteristic of leshmaniasis. The woman was Quechua and didn't know any Spanish so there were three languages being translated in one 4x11 foot room. (Quechua is viewed in Peru as a poor person's language and was the language once spoken by the Incans.) In fact, this lady is a really good example of how La Fuente (Dr. Allen's clinic) is trying to serve and bring wellness back to the whole person, not just the biological part. So last night the nurses took her home with them and gave her food and shelter, but we're looking for a temporary home for her here in San Jeronimo while she receives treatment. She lives 5 1/2 hours away-- a four hour walk to the closest bus stop and a 1 1/2 hour ride into town. So there is obviously no way she can get the medications and attention she needs at home. So the mission of the clinic is to give a social, spiritual, physical, and emotional support to those who are the poorest and this poor lady really embodies that need. So remember to pray for this young woman and the clinic who is going to be receiving more patients like her who have no hope, save the kindness of other people and the grace of God.

Spanish word of the day: La Fuente which means "the fountain". This is the name of the clinic that I've been working at and I think it's appropriate because it is a small, beautiful thing that gives refreshment to those who come it.

Paro Hike and Play

2008-07-10T08:02:00.006-05:00

Yesterday was a day of relaxation. Since Paro shuts every down in the country we decided to walk 2 miles to the Allens' house and eat their amazing lunch with them. They recently got a swing in their backyard so their house is the hangout place for the rest of the neighborhood kids. Yesterday, with everyone accounted for there were 15 people in their yard at one time. These kids are like American kids in energy level, need for authority, excitement at new toys, etc. The sad thing I observed yesterday, and I'd already seen it in Mexico when I went there in college, is toddlers being raised by their 8-10 year old siblings and/or cousins. The parents both have to work jobs just to put food on the table, literally just to have food to eat (very unlike both parents working in America), so the under 2 year olds are left to be raised by their very immature siblings. Since it is all kids and no parents Jeanine Allen is thinking about starting a semi-organized VBS so the kids can learn a little bit about the Bible as they play.

Our other activity yesterday was a hike we took up the mountains behind the Allens' house. It was beautiful. Here are a couple pictures. The landscape here is so much different than the US.

A Primer on Peru

2008-07-08T19:58:00.002-05:00

Today was a good, normal day. It is our 7th day in Peru and I feel like we are getting used to being here. We both tried to learn a little bit about the country before we left. The best site that I found was from the BBC. The link is here for anyone to read in case you want to learn a little bit about this very unique place. There are also links on this page to news articles, weather, and a timeline. So here's a homework assignment because I like comments on my blog (and I need affirmation every once in a while): find something interesting about Peru and post it so everyone can learn from it.

Spanish word of the day: Paro. Although this is not the official Spanish word for a workers' strike welga actually is, this is what Peruvians do at specific times during the year. Tomorrow is a paro day for the transportation workers here in Peru so there won't be any buses, taxis, or even personal vehicles driven on the roads. All of the businesses shut down, so we won't have to do much work and maybe I can catch up on my journaling if I decide not to join the mob and burn some tires. Just kidding Mom.

Overwhelmed

2008-07-07T20:19:00.004-05:00

Overwhelmed has two definitions that are relevant to me right now: 1. to surge over or submerge; engulf. 2. to present with an excessive amount. I feel both right now.

Definition #1 connotes something that is dangerous like waves crashing over a boat. This is the feeling I get when I start thinking in global terms about healthcare, social injustice, racism, consumerism, poverty, etc. Being here in Peru gives all of these issues that I've considered in theory names and faces. It's not that all these issues don't exist in the United States, but they are not nearly as apparent as they are here. Take for example Altiva Canas. This is a place that's about 15 minutes away from our apartment that Jasmine (the Peruvian nurse doing all the talking), Megan, and I went today to talk to some people about personal and social hygiene focusing especially on their children. One of the families we talked to today (a family of five) lives on 2 soles a day-- that equals about $0.70. The lady we talked to was 31 and looked about 45 and being the wonderful hostess that she was, she served us all she had to offer-- tea-colored water from the public well. We had to explain that as Americans we could not drink this water, but the nurse that we were with drank it down like a Dasani. All this to say, I'm overwhelmed with things to think about.

Definition #2 connotes something that is lavish and wonderful like the presents you got for Christmas as a kid. This is the feeling I got as we walked around the mountains of Machu Picchu. I'd love to describe everything we saw when as climbed the steps made for tiny Incan feet but I'd have to write a poem or a song and I don't have the time or confidence for that. This resort in the mountains was fit for a king, but it did more than suggest that he wasn't the true master of his domain. The Rockies or Appalachians are not apt comparisons to the sheer 2,000 foot precipices in the Andes. Here, the clouds kiss the peaks and leave them white with snow and glacier. The world is beneath your feet and it feels like heaven is closer than it has ever been. In this case, the 422 pictures that we took do a much better job than my words can. Overwhelmed is how we felt.

Spanish word of the day: el cielo. It means "the sky" and "Heaven". At Machu Picchu you can understand why the Spanish used the same word for both.

A Good Day

2008-07-04T22:05:00.006-05:00

(San Jeronimo has doorways that rival beauty and uniqueness of The Shire.)

It's kind of late for me right now and Meg's already headed to bed so this one's going to be short. Today, we mostly hung out with the Allen family in the afternoon. This morning I went to the clinic and saw what we think is cutaneous Leishmaniasis (a tropical disease transmitted by a sandfly) and Megan helped the girls with Math, reading, and writing. Today was fun and relaxing especially going into downtown Cusco, a very old colonial city, for dinner and eating some really good food that only cost us 79/S which equals about $26.33. Tomorrow morning through Sunday night we are going to be in Agua Calientes and Macchu Pichu climbing one of the most famous mountains in the world so don't expect any updates then. Anyway, everything is going very well and we miss y'all. Pray for our safety and endurance as we climb. It isn't very dangerous but it might be grueling. We'll bring back plenty of pictures.

Spanish phrase of the day- No urinar. A sign posted in the hospital in Cusco telling people not to piss on the floors. It has come to the city folks attention that many campesinos (people from the countryside) are not familiar with the funny porcelain apparatuses that we call toilets so they prefer to just urinar right there on the floor. I think we should all take a moment of silence for the unsuspecting victims who have slipped on human urine in the hospital hallways of Cusco..... Good night.

Megan's First-Ever Blog Post:

2008-07-03T17:36:00.003-05:00

Well, we're back at the apartment after our first full day in Cuzco. Today Austin worked in the clinic (which is just a half-block from the apartment where we're staying), and I hung out with the doctor's wife and three daughters. We went to visit the lady who has the five baby lambs and watched her bottle feed them. She also has four children, two pigs (one is pregnant), a little kitty cat, several large chickens, and a half-dozen little baby chicks. The girls had so much fun playing with all the baby animals. I made friends with a baby chicken who took a liking to standing on my foot. After lunch (we eat lunch with the whole family every day -- it's the big meal), Austin and I climbed up the mountain behind the house with the two older daughters and their neighbors, a little girl who is about 8 and a little boy who is about 5 or 6. Of course my Spanish is...not so good, but we had a lot of fun with them.

According to Austin, here is the Spanish phrase of the day: "Toma un photo!", spoken by the little neighbor boy (pictured above) who loved smiling for the camera among the Incan ruins and his friends. His biggest smiles came when he looked at the pictures of himself -- so exciting!

San Jeronimo

2008-07-02T18:06:00.004-05:00

(image from ih3.ggpth.com of where we landed in Cusco today)

Good evening everyone! I'm sitting in San Jeronimo, Cusco, Peru (city, district, country). Meg and I landed in this mountainous area at about 11am this morning after about 20 hours in 4 airports and 3 airplanes. We got about 5-6 hours of sleep last night and I have a feeling that we are going to sleep well tonight, although last night wasn't altogether terrible thanks to the neck pillows, acetazolamide, and our 2 hour nap in Lima. It's about 6:15 pm right now (Central time here too) and it is pretty much completely dark. You see, not only is it winter down here but it's also surrounded by mountains so the sun goes to bed a little bit earlier than it does over the Gulf of Mexico. Like Dad and I found out a few nights ago, the temperature swings about 40 degrees Fahrenheit each day from about 70 in the day to 30 at night. Pretty chilly for an apartment without any heat. Well, today has been really good: we ate a siesta lunch with the Allens (the missionary family) and played with their three daughters who are very cute and smart. After that Meg hung out with Jeanine Allen and her girls while Will and I meandered on the streets of St. Jeronimo. I got some some good pictures in the town today I'll try to post them soon as long as I can figure out how to sync our new camera with the old Mac. Well, that's about all I've got for now so we'll try send updates as often as possible.

Spanish word of the day: la oveja- the sheep. The word was used in reference to, Jenny you'll enjoy this, the woman that the Allens know who is tandem breastfeeding her infant child and, yes, her one of her infant sheep. To put any worries to rest this is not a normal practice so don't think all Peruvians are like this, but we thought that this was a great story to start the trip off with. I guess you gotta do what you gotta do to keep everyone one going even if it means trans-species nursing.

Torched

2008-04-09T07:50:00.003-05:00

(Picture from www.chinapost. com.tw/ news_images.jpg)

What's the deal with the Olympic torch protesters? Would anyone in the West be protesting China's policy with Tibet if the torch weren't going through their country? I mean China's had a terrible human rights record for at least the last sixty years since Mao came to power and I haven't seen anyone on the news picketing in D.C., London, or Paris until now. The reason is because the people who actually care about the Chinese and Tibetan people are not the ones who are trying to tackle poor defenseless torchbearers. By the way torch tacklers: the eternal flame is not a symbol of Chinese communism and/or oppression; it's a symbol of the Olympics Games whose head haunchos decided to have China host this year. Why weren't you outside the IOC meetings picketing when they were deciding on where to hold the Games? I agree ideologically with putting pressure on the Chinese government to be more responsible for their human rights violations, but we are not going to tackle a beast like China by spearing some nice French lady getting the chance of a lifetime. I promise China is not waiting with bated breath to see if the torchbearers are safe, they don't even do that for their own citizens. So to all Western democratic idealogues stop trying to get on TV and go do something real.

Good Summer, Bad Economics

2008-04-08T07:26:00.002-05:00

(Image from an anonymous google images source)

So a few weeks ago Meg and I were contemplating how we can obey our commander in chief and spend the money he wastes on us to "stimulate the economy". Now, I'm no economic genius here, but taking tax dollars from the people who have money and know how to spend it and giving it to the people who are barely making enough doesn't seem to quite add up in my head. I keep joking with Meg's dad that the government is taking money from him and giving to us. So despite Mr. Bush's shaky economic sense (pun intended), individually I'm pretty happy about the extra cash. In a twisted way, it panders to my American psyche of spending money recklessly with regard for wise investment. So we contemplated traveling to certain places in the country Chattanooga, New Orleans, Chicago, maybe a 2nd honeymoon to Montana, but another opportunity came up. That's what Macchu Pichu has to do with the good ole economic booster. You see there's this missionary couple that home schools their kids and practices medicine among the locals in Kusco, Peru and they've invited us to come down during the month of July for as long as we want. I'd be able to follow the doc around, do a couple of medical things with him, and basically learn what it is like to live as a rural, international, primary care physician. Of course, Meg and I are youngest children (i.e. not administratively competent) so we have yet to hammer out the details of the trip but if it works out it should be really cool. That wouldn't be a bad view to see on your third wedding anniversary would it? So there's an update (happy Tim?), sorry for the delay, I still have a love/hate relationship with blogs and cyberspace in general.

Why can't I Finish a Book

2008-02-26T08:10:00.005-06:00

(Picture from http:// archives/ stackobooks.jpg)

I'm always starting new books and never finishing old ones. I know some people who can read one book at a time (Tim) and actually finish it. I can't and it bothers me. It makes me think that I have some kind of commitment problem. Why do I hit a wall at page 75? Amazingly, I did finish a Vonnegut book not to long ago, but I'm in the middle of about 10 books right now and I know I'll pick up more before I finish even one of them. My problem stems from the fact that when I see something interesting I think that I'll forget about it if I don't pick it up immediately and start reading. I guess I need to make a list of things I want to read, but I kind of have that on my Amazon wish list right now (hint, hint for next holiday season), and it hasn't cured me.

So what do I do? Is it just natural selection of books? Should I not worry about the stack of book in the living room and just let the book with the most interesting ideas survive my short attention span? It think another problem comes from the fact that I don't have enough time to read everything I want to (because of the whole med school thing) so I feel like if I read the first 75 pgs. that I can sort of honestly say that I've read the book. So here's the confession, I do this so I can sound well- read without actually putting the time in to read the whole book. Man, that feels good to get off my chest. So now you know that I'm pathetic and I just want to sound smart. Anyway, any suggestions, besides stop being so insecure, on how to cure my bookitis.

Ebola, Africa, and Gorillas

2008-02-20T09:09:00.004-06:00

(picture from BBC article)

The missionary doctors that I have linked to this blog have been battling an outbreak of the Ebola virus in Bundibugyo, Uganda since late November. In fact, the WHO thinks that a new strain of this very virulent, deadly disease evolved in this particular instance. The last count I can find on their blog is 36 deaths in the first (and thankfully only) month of the outbreak. It ravaged their lives killing one of the African physicians (Jonah Kule) they were very close to and separating their family for close to a month. There is an article about Jonah here. Really tragic stuff.

The virus is known only to exist in Africa and it is usually transmitted from ape to human, although there are other reservoirs like duikers, certain plants, insects, shrews, and bats. Often what happens is that people from towns or villages near the jungle will go in and hunt for food for their family and kill a jungle-dwelling primate. Instead of hauling the whole animal back to town, the hunter will butcher the animal there in the jungle and leave the inedible parts behind. The problem that this presents is that if the hunter has a cut and he gets the ape's blood mixed into his, and the animal has ebola, and the virus mutates to a human form, he can get ebola and transfer it to his family, village, etc. and havoc begins to reign. It sounds far-fetched and unlikely but it happened in late November in Uganda.

Usually the virus is much more deadly in humans than other primates, but it seems from a BBC article I just read that it is affecting some of our animal friends. So, as seems to always be the case in Africa the situation is complicated. Not only is there a deadly virus, very little healthcare, an endangered species of gorilla, and a beautiful natural resource (the jungle), but there is also a lot of political strife. But in an unusual twist of events Uganda, Rwanda, and the Democratic Republic of Congo, three countries not know for political togetherness, are coming together to try to protect these gigantic mountain gorillas from going extinct. It seems to be one of those situations that no one could have planned. Everyone wins: gorillas get to not go extinct (always good), people are protected from getting ebola by helping the gorillas stay healthy, the economy is helped because tourist pay big bucks to get a glimpse of this beautiful creature, and the rebel groups who are occupying the only remaining habitat of the gorillas are ganged up on by three governments who rarely see eye to eye. Phew! Good news from Africa, what a rarity and a wonderful thing to be thankful for.

So after all this you might be asking why does Austin care about this? It has all these things I care about wrapped into one story: Africa, the animal world and conservation, healthcare (esp. infectious disease), people in poverty, political reconciliation, and people we know (by proxy) there experiencing it all. Well, have a good day and remember Africa, the Myhre doctors, and the mountain gorillas in your prayers.

Just Under 2 Months

2008-02-16T08:10:00.004-06:00

(Picture from hopenc.org)

So I'm a total slacker for not being consistent with blogging. The one reason I don't read other people's blog is because they are not consistent, and look what I'm doing. Shame on me. How can I expect to have a worldwide audience if I don't keep my fans updated?

Anyway, one of the main reasons I'm blogging today is because I talked to my cynical partner in crime yesterday, Zach Cheney, and he revealed to me that he was now a committed member of the blogosphere as well. Both of us made fun of bloggers while we studied together in St. Louis and now we're both eating our words like a turkey dinner. Regardless of our inconsistencies, we are tender souls and would appreciate it if your read our humble thoughts. Moving on, I'm going to put some links on the sidebar today for everyone to check out other blogs that I read. They are mostly from friends who I knew in St. Louis, with the very special exception of Robert and Tiff.

Just to get everyone up to speed: Since Christmas I've been thinking a lot about the future. Meg and I really trying to figure what we are going to do with our lives long term. We've have talked through our options and we haven't come to any conclusions yet but we have considered the Air Force, Project MedSend, and doing a rural program here in Alabama. All these considerations are meant to pay back all the debt that we are currently accruing. Both of us have this real discomfort with accumulating debt and so we're looking into these things. So far I've met with an Air Force recruiter and talked to Project MedSend and I feel like MedSend makes more sense right now. So there's the update and if anyone has advice to give I'd love to hear it.

What I Don't Need for Christmas

2007-12-18T07:55:00.000-06:00

More stuff. I know the traditions. When family gets together we're supposed to get each other presents and it's good and fun and I like it. But, I live in this apartment that doesn't hold much stuff and I sit around and study for most of my day, so how much stuff do I actually need?

I could probably use a couple winter shirts (I could give away about 30 more that I never wear) and maybe a gas card to help finance getting to and from school. So Christmas is about Christ emptying himself by becoming a baby, but for me Christmas is about getting things. I'm sure much of this will change in the future when I start making some money and actually begin to buy presents for family members and children. But, shouldn't I stop asking for things that I don't need and maybe ask my family members to channel some of that away from me and towards those who are truly in need.

My mom being the planner and wonderful mother that she is always asks me weeks in advance what I want for Christmas and I can never think of anything. Why? Because I really do have everything I NEED. Wouldn't it be more in line with the Christmas spirit to spend the money to the marginalized and the oppressed of the world rather than asking my in-laws and parents to keep all resources in the family. (Now, to all who are reading this and have already bought me a present don't think I am not grateful for your thoughtfulness and generosity. Really, thank you. I love presents, I'm just questioning why I love them so much.) My materialism and selfishness is the problem. I often think even my petty needs are more important than other's actual needs.

Anyway, I'm resolving as of now that while my resources are slim (and this is a very relative statement) I'm going stop asking for stuff, start buying more gifts for people, and ask those who would buy me stuff to give it to a charity. Not only is this better for the world as a whole, it will also give me and my family members who store my stuff more space in their closets and attics.

Any thoughts? Am I sullying the goodnesses and wonder of the gathering around the Christmas tree and opening presents? Well, this is my attempt to be somewhat provocative.

Life is Good

2007-12-17T07:18:00.000-06:00

Right now I'm sitting on in my living room icing my ankle and watching Sportscenter with a stack of books and magazines that I've been wanting to finish or start since August. I'm fired up about a lot of things right now. To begin, I passed my first semester of med school. I think I put more time into studying this semester than I did in all of college, it was insane. The thing with med school is not intelligence, it's endurance. If anyone is willing to learn this crazy medical language and is able to sit and study for 10 or 11 hours a day it's no problem. I guess what my dad said about hard work making up for what is lacking in intelligence is true. (He didn't necessarily mean that I was lacking intelligence (I don't think), but that I just need to work hard if I want something.

Next, Meg and I are heading to Memphis on Thursday for Christmas break. So here's all the anticipated highlights of the week: Erling Jenson (sp) apparently an amazing restaurant that the Johnsons are taking us to, going to their cabin out in the woods to play with the niece and nephew and look for deer, turtles, bugs, hawks, and all the wildlife you don't see in the suburbs, of course Christmas day and all of its wonder, seeing my sister again for the second time in a month, catching up with old Memphis friends, not cooking our own food, not hearing the people above us walk around like sumo wrestlers, not studying, reading some books for pleasure, seeing Meg more than 3 hours a day, going to the beach for New Year's, seeing Meg's Aunt Ethleyn (sp), and, not that this list is extensive, but watching college football bowl games.

Another bright note is that Meg and I joined our church yesterday. This is the first time I've ever become a member of church without my parents. I was kind of against the whole membership thing for a while. My argument was that why do I need to join a church, it doesn't have any real significance in my relationships with people or with God so why do it. But I can see why it matters now. For one it's kind of like a marriage ceremony, you don't need it to be married but it's more celebratory and it's a formal, public way to commit yourself to someone else. I think too many people (myself included at one point) date their church instead of commit to it. That's why people move around so much because once you get mad at each other for some little offense you break up. Dr. Johnson said it well, (I paraphrase or change completely), "Churches are like attorneys the closer you get to them the less you like them." Of course neither one of us think this is completely true but it pretty indicative of many people's experiences. I didn't mean to give you a rant about ecclesiology but I guess I'm trying to explain my change of heart. Anyway, it was a good experience and we really love our new family here in Birmingham.

Well, I'm really excited about the next couple of weeks and the fun it's going to be to see all the people I love. So, I guess I'll be blogging a few times this week 'cause I don't have much to do so I'll say something more provocative tomorrow.

Top 10

2007-12-04T18:47:00.000-06:00

Alright, so apparently I've bored most of you with my silly interests in narrators, Michael Jordan, and fried turkey so let's get some interaction. The assignment is: this year's top five books that you've read. (A few rules: You can't say the Bible, a map that helped you find your way, Wikipedia, or this blog.)

My 5 in random order:
1. All 7 Harry Potter books (that's right) by J.K. Rowling
2. Wampeters, Foma, and Granfalloons by Kurt Vonnegut
3. The Heart of a Servant Leader by C. John Miller (sounds campy but its not)
4. Animals (a huge pictoral anthology) by Don E. Wilson
5. The Conformist by Italo Calvino

Alright your turn.....

Boris Karloff and Jim Dale

2007-11-29T17:31:00.000-06:00

(From a newsday.com blog) Will anyone ever forget this green color of the Grinch, it's perfect!

Two amazing storytellers. Last night I had the distinct privilege of hearing both of these men narrate two shows. The first was a classic, it was Boris Karloff in none other than Dr. Seuss' How the Grinch Stole Christmas and the second was Jim Dale in a new one which I thoroughly enjoyed, it was called Pushing Daisies. Meg and I of course love Jim Dale because he told the Harry Potter stories to us in on our car trips. If anyone hasn't read Harry Potter yet please listen to it from Jim Dale on CD, you can get it from any half way decent library system.

Let me just say that there is really something to be said about skillful story-telling. It is definitely a lost art these days. All the movies, TV shows, and various forms of entertainment have stamped out our ability to tell good stories to each other. My dad is a really good joke-teller and I think if he tried he'd be really good at stories too. In my opinion, the key to doing it well is knowing what to emphasize. The Grinch, first of all is an amazingly illustrated story of redemption without the movie, but think of how much Boris Karloff adds to that little 26 minute movie. As Meg and I were watching it last night we couldn't help but revel and laugh in how good the narration was.

And Pushing Daisies was a quirking, fast-moving, artsy sitcom that is about this guy who can resurrect the dead with one touch, but kill them with two. It sounds weird and it is, but I really liked it. It's kind of a love story, detective show, comedy, and intelligent take on the world all rolled into one. My favorite line of the show last night was when the blunt detective was about to arrest a suspected murderer and he and his sidekicks were debating how this guy might have interpreted what he did, and the detective said, "The truth isn't like a bunch of little puppies that all look the same and you pick your favorite one. There's one truth and it's knocking at the door."

Anyway, I just thought I'd put these modern day bards out there for y'all to know about. Have a good day.

Just Checking In

2007-11-28T17:52:00.000-06:00

(One of the two turkeys we cooked, this one was fried. I actually got this picture from cookingamerica.com, but you get the idea.)

When I was in high school, my mom used to make me call her once or twice a night "just to check in". However, painful this was for me at the time, I now realize the purpose. She just wanted to know what I was doing and that I wasn't being arrested. Likewise, I for all five of you who care, I'm just checking in.

Thanksgiving was really good. Ashley, my big sis, is an awesome hostess. It's funny to see how we all grow up. When you're learning life lessons at the same rate as the people around you, you tend not to notice the changes. But after this weekend, I have to say that Ashley is not longer the sorority girl I remember from our last year in the same town. She is a bonafide adult. She cooked tons of good meals, treated all her guests with grace and dignity, she had fun, watched football, cleaned up after the "dirty Dalgos" (Megan excluded from the dirty part), and she was grateful to God for us the whole time. That's freakin' awesome. I really admire her, she's got so many virtues that are foreign to me. So thanks Ash.

School is back in high gear and I'm still trying to stay on the surface and not breathe in the water hovering close to my nose. But, here's one comfort: when I apply for residency I probably won't have to do too much explaining for not making A's. Why is that? I'm probably going into primary care and not many people want to go into that (low pay, long hours) so I don't have to kill myself trying to outdo my classmates. Another comfort: life is so much bigger than climbing the ladder. What? I mean that there always seems to be something better just over the horizon, but in the end that search is a mirage so I'm going to be content where I am, whether it's an A, B, or C in Fundamentals II I don't care.

OK, so I'm going to have to blog about more random things that I like and what I think about life because I need a break from medical stuff. So anyway, just thought I'd check in.

Turner Syndrome

2007-11-09T08:12:00.000-06:00

A Picture Comparing X and Y Chromosomes

Alright, so I was reading this ridiculously arduous Pathology book the other day and I came across Turner Syndrome. I'd read about it before in Genetics class at Alabama but this time some questions really hit me. So as most know, a part of our sexual make-up as humans is that males have XY chromosomes and females have XX. There have been many jokes told about how pathetically deficient the Y chromosome is compared to the X. Men, unfortunately this is true, but let's just say that as a male I respect equally both X and Y chromosomes and I think women should too.

Anyway, Turner Syndrome is a genetic disorder that is characterized (for the most part) by someone have only one sex chromosome which is an X. A person with this syndrome is a female in appearance, but she doesn't develop like one. She never really sexually develops, she is infertile, she develops physical abnormalities like hair loss and webbing of the neck, tumors and heart disease are common, and she often struggles with learning disabilities. This is a really sad life. In my studies at Alabama in English classes we talked a lot about how, if, or should we can define gender. We talked about how normal society defines gender by behavior, desires typical of one sex or the other, and physical appearance; and this works for the most part. But in Turner Syndrome I have to wonder how these girls maintain a solid identity. I mean take away sexual characteristics, intelligence, physical attractiveness, and physical health and most of us don't have much else to define ourselves by.

For some reason a question hit me reading this. What do I define myself by? Of course this isn't the first time I've ever asked myself this question, but I was forced to consider, what if all these "normal" things about me were removed? It's made me do a little soul searching and ask whether or not my identity is in anything that is solid. 'Cause usually I tend to put my stock in the fact that I'll be respected doctor one day, or that I get along with people pretty well, or that I can accomplish amazing athletic feats, etc. I definitely think that our bodies, actions, and minds/souls/hearts are very intimately connected, but some people don't have the luxury of normalcy in their mind, body, and deeds. To me, if we want to include people with Turner Syndrome into normal society and humanity, we have to find another way to define who we are as humans, whether male or female.

Anyway, frankly, this is my argument to find our meaning in God rather than in our normal, achievement-driven ways. It just seems more inclusive of people who don't have the same capacities or functions that "normal" people do. And in the end I think it makes us more sane.

Houses for $1

2007-10-30T06:59:00.001-05:00

So I was listening to NPR on the way to school this morning and I heard this report about cities with diminishing populations giving away abandoned houses and the property they are on to the neighbors living next door. The city reported on was Flint, MI (former home of a huge GM plant that closed and Michael Moore's documentary Roger and Me). The issue was that many of these abandoned homes were being used for all the illicit activities that no one wants to live next to, so the city decided to just hand the property over to the neighbors figuring that they, out of anyone, care the most about what's going on there. The city tried to auction off these abandoned properties but they weren't getting enough for them to be worth their time and resources so they just gave them away. In addition, the city is also converting condemned properties to neighborhood parks, rarely ever a bad thing. As a young, financially insecure hopeful physician who wants to work the indigent population and who wants to own a home someday this really appeals to me. Now, I'm pretty sure these homes and properties they are giving away are not in the most affluents parts of Flint, but with this change these neighborhoods will become a little more agrarian and I think add a lot to the quality and aesthetics of life there. Anyway, some other cities they mentioned that are doing this same thing are Little Rock and New Orleans. The mayor of Flint referred to his city's weakening economy as a "gradual Katrina stretched over 35 years". That's a pretty powerful metaphor. Now, I don't really want to move anywhere north of St. Louis, that was cold enough, but the idea of buying a home with a substantial amount of land in a city that probably needs physicians is appealing at least maybe for NO or LR. Well, just thought that was an interesting idea.

He's Back

2007-10-26T16:06:00.000-05:00

Those were my two favorite words as a 13 year old boy. Why? No, it's not because I was a particularly religious chap who contemplated the resurrection. These words carried the weight they did because of number 23. Words defy me. Defy was word often used to describe him. I feel bad for kids these days who wake up in the morning and don't have posters of him occupying the largest wall in their room (as I did until I graduated high school). Actually, "I'm back" were the words that resurrected the swooning world of sports back into greatness for a brief time. If you don't know who I'm talking about (and the picture wasn't a dead give away), shame on you.

Michael Jordan. I was watching TV the other night while Meg was grading some papers and I couldn't stand watching the Rockies implode on themselves so I started going through my regular channels. 16-ESPN, 20-TBS, 23-National Geographic, 30-Discovery, 51-TNT, 64-Animal Planet, nothing. So phase II- 17-ESPN2, and then it happened 18-ESPN Classic! (Sadly, I just listed all those channels by heart, I shouldn't know all that, I need to save room for medical information.) The year was 1995 and the Bulls were playing the Magic. I watched the game, it was amazing, basketball in all it's purity, it takes me back. Unfortunately, the Bulls lost the game and the series to the Magic that night, but he was back and everyone knew that soon they would suffer unders the unstoppable perfection of MJ.

If you could get a Ph.D. in basketballology I would do and write my thesis on "The Aesthetics and Superlative Nature of Michael Jordan's Mad Game". It's hard to pick which stats should be mentioned but here a few from Wikipedia:

* 14 time All-Star
* Olympic Gold Medalist—1984, 1992
* Five time MVP—1988, 1991, 1992, 1996, 1998
* Rookie of the Year—1984
* Defensive Player of the Year—1988
* 11 times All-NBA—10 times first team
* 9 time All-Defensive First Team
* Lead the Bulls to 6 NBA Finals Championships (2 3peats)
* Most scoring titles—10
* Most NBA Finals MVP awards—6
* Highest career scoring average—30.12
* Highest career scoring average playoffs—33.45
* Most consecutive games scoring in double figures—866
* Highest single series scoring average NBA Finals—41.0 (1993)

So this is my tribute. Mike, if you ever read this blog, high five man for being the best who will ever live. All this to say, I wanna be like Mike.

2007-10-23T14:30:00.000-05:00

So here at UASOM we're doing this integrated curriculum where you are supposed to learn basic science and its clinical applications at the same time. Basically, what this means is that our classes are condensed into this summer school-like format that make things more interesting, but much more intense.

So yesterday we had this ethics session about Big Pharm (pharmaceutical companies making tons of money off selling brand-name drugs). There are some crazy things going on with which drugs and doctors. The stink is that supposedly Pharm reps are giving doctors all these gifts like free lunches, free trips to tropical locations to hear a plug for their product, and free samples, pens, pads, etc. and these gifts influence doctors to prescribe their medication and not the cheaper generic stuff. (By the way none of this is new, its been going on for a long time, but the marketing of drug companies is increasing drastically in recent years.) There are stats that, in essence, prove that this marketing strategy works too. So what's the solution for me? Should I not welcome drug reps for fear that I might start prescribing the more expensive medication to get a cruise compliments of Pfizer? Or should I take the cruise and not show up the meetings and stick it to 'em by taking their money and not listening to their spiel? Meg wouldn't go for that.

For me this raises bigger questions about the medical field like should it be a business or a service-oriented profession? I definitely think that helping people is a higher calling than making good money, but how do I parse out all the conflicting interests that will inevitably come my way like taking less pay to help needy people, providing for my (future and present) family, taking a seemingly harmless trip on the bill of a pharmaceutical company, etc.? Should patients simply trust that their doctor is looking out for their best interests? Probably not. There's a lot of greedy, dishonest people out there. It is interesting to me how many of our daily interactions, even something as serious as our health, still dependent on blind trust of other people. I guess this is reason for getting to know your doctor, pastor, mechanic better and for learning things on our own.

Med School: My First Real Job

2007-10-17T07:06:00.000-05:00

The picture is of Volker Hall on UAB's campus, where I spend about 12 hours of everyday!

Since I've had the last few days off to be at home and do domestic chores, do a little thinking and reading, and watch too much ESPN I've come to a couple of conclusions about my life. First, play time is not meant to be a regular occurrence. I'm starting to realize that every choice I make keeps me from not doing other things. The problem is that I love too many things like learning about animals, reading literature and theology, hanging out with Meg, getting to know people well, watching The Office, good beer, art, Alabama football, etc. but I can't have them all. Like my dad always says, "It sucks getting older." Anyway, trade-offs define the adult world so much more than my old youthful world, that's why I say med school is my first real job. Kind of connected to this realization is that I want to make good use of the time I actually have. Usually what that means is less ESPN and more talking to Meg, reading good books, and catching up with friends. It is really easy to get so busy that after a while you forget why you're waking up at the butt crack of dawn. So my first real job that I pay them for is making me slow down and think about why: why would I want to learn all this crazy stuff, why would I work this hard if I don't plan on making a whole lot of money in primary care, why do I care so much about cleaning our apartment, why does being overworked affect Meg and I so differently, etc. All these are part of my thoughts the last few days. So back to ESPN (or a book) for me. We're off to Savannah tomorrow to see Jake and Celeste, so have a good weekend (if anyone is actually reading this, ha).

I Owe You an Explanation

2007-10-15T06:42:00.000-05:00

I've always hated blogs. But they are like crack to me. I can't kick the habit of reading other people's even though I don't like the idea of it. My main beef is that a blog is like a little universe centered around ME. There's this pretty little page with my picture on it and makes me feel so special! I should probably just be happy with Facebook. But, I can't help myself, I have this irresistible urge. So here's my agenda, I'm always wishing I could talk to my friends and family more often than I do, and I know that when I read other people's blogs I want to call them and see what's going on. So this is an effort to get us to talk more or at least for you to know what's going on with me. I realize after a short while my mom and my sister will be the only ones who read it but oh well, at least they know little more about their Austin. Okay, talk to y'all soon.

By the way, I'm on fall break from now until next Monday, so if anyone wants to call me or hang out, I'm free until Wednesday when Meg and I leave for Savannah, GA to see Coach Collins lose (I mean coach) his first high school football game.

Here's a picture because you're supposed to post pictures on blogs. It's not of me, but it's a part of my collection of "The Beach Art Series" that will make me millions one day.

Oh yeah, the title of the blog as many of you will know is the phrase that I have most often uttered in my life. Why? Because that's what I get on all my hamburgers and until about five or six years ago that's all I ever ordered at restaurants or fast food joints, so 19 to 20 years of hamburgers with cheese, ketchup, and pickles only, hmmmmm . . . makes my mouth water even at 7:30 in the morning.

To the Four Corners

2007-10-05T11:43:00.000-05:00

I'm back. I know all zero of you have been waiting for this day. Through a whole lot of hard work and procrastination I figured out how to login and restart my blogging. Tell all your friends.

2007-02-04T00:01:00.000-06:00